What in the ‘World’

Well, it’s been long enough I had to ‘login’ and they’ve updated the format for the site….. anyway…

This world right now, I have so many thoughts, so many questions that I honestly don’t know where to even start. So let’s start with Jesus, the author of our faith. Heb 12…. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

So what does Jesus say… I know one thing for sure, He is not surprised by any of ‘it’. Jesus found it all joy set before him in enduring the cross, scorning the cross’s shame and THEN…. to sit at the right hand of the throne of God. Wow, what a journey He went through… all for us. Because He thought we were worth it, because He loved/loves us. So let us fix our eyes on Him.

About this ‘thing’ going on in the world. Who to trust, who is lying, because honestly someone has to be with such opposite ends of the spectrum on this ‘thing’. You either agree 100% with one side or another….. or do we?… I believe many of us are somewhere in the middle… and I do know Jesus tends to meet us in the middle… the middle is where peace is. Go with me for a second… think about Anxiety vs Depression… opposite ends of the spectrum… peace is in the present, not worrying about the future(Anxiety) or dwelling on the past(Depression), but staying present and focusing on what blessings we have right now, this is peace.

For most of us our present moments are bombarded with change, new decisions, input from a million places, mostly being the media world; FB, IG, News channels, YouTube and on and on I could go. Our present is being flooded with ‘futuristic’ thoughts… insert… anxiety.

I’m not writing for a debt, I’m writing because I have the freedom to write…. don’t I? The Lord tells us to be quick to listen, slow to speak… and this goes both ways, it doesn’t matter what you believe or don’t. So I’ve been listening, pondering for over 40 days of this quarantine mess. The few things I have spoken have been nothing more than asking others to ponder, seek out multiple resources and question everything. I think that’s part of the blessing of living in a free country.

Slow to speak…. not DON’T speak.

So I’m going to speak and ask the Lord to guide me through my thoughts…. Here we go.

First off, I’m not a huge TV person. I don’t watch the news much because long have gone the days of Walter Cronkite and Dan Rather, who were NEVER afraid to throw out a hard question. Long gone are the days of Oliver North trials and the government being under investigation.

Insert present: Negativity floods the airwaves more now than ever in our history. The social media world floods us with all this negativity, it is this massive ‘spirit’ of confusion. Yes I said ‘spirit’. If I’ve lost you, it’s ok. I’m not into convincing anyone of anything, nor am I trying to ‘persuade’ you to a side… I don’t really have a side… oh wait… yes I do… Abba Father, and Christ in me(the hope of glory -Col 1:27). Why would you listen to me? I’m just an average person. What I share are my thoughts, the way God designed me is this… process, ponder, process, ponder…. so here I go.

An argument: Can you imagine how different things would be if the Bible was based on only the knowledge of man(Hence the fall of man was the dang Tree of Knowledge)? Oh friends, imagine if Jesus picked only the men with the most degrees, the most money, the scholars, the leaders of the world, the government officials, the reporters, the MDs, PhDs and the 4.0 Harvard grads?…. He didn’t. He picked misfits, rebels, fishermen, tax collectors, soldiers, brothers, and prostitutes to be his disciples, prophets, writers of the Word of God. HUMMM…..

There is a BIG difference between man’s knowledge and God’s knowledge.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts. -Isaiah 55:8-9

I think some people see Jesus as a gentle man floating through the air, bounding and skipping with flowers in His hair… hardly. The dude was amazing. He knew when to have conflict, He knew when to speak up, even to the highest ranking official. He walked with the broken and He spoke with them, not always sunshine and rainbows, He spoke real…truth. He was loving, caring, righteous and bold. Oh to be all the things; mercy, teacher, prophet, servant, etc… My point, He sees all of ‘this’ and is not surprised by any of it.

How will His people react? Will they lash out in anger among one another? Will they fight for their own agenda? Will they speak truth….. IN LOVE and will they seek truth? I hope we as believers can remember our source when seeking truth, because right now He is the only thing that is true. Though I have a sense even ‘that’ will be questioned soon.

If you don’t believe in the evil forces working among us, boy do I ask you to pray about it. Ask the Lord to reveal truth to you in the coming days. Ask the Holy Spirit to guard your mind in the chaos that is here and the chaos that will come… and it will come…. I have no doubt. We will need to be more grounded than ever in our faith. I don’t say it to cause fear, I say it because He is always the answer in all circumstances. Do you believe that our own faith may be put in the limelight of questioning? Front and center? I believe it will be… I hope you are ready when the questions come, when the doubt of the world will be thrown at us.

Some of the ‘things’ I have a ‘check’ about: Media(all of it), Govt, Chemical Warfare, WHO, OWO, FDA, CDC, SS, CIA, AI, and everything that we have been conditioned to trust. At times, I begin to wonder if our freedom of speech is being eliminated.

Some questions I have: Why were the schools the first thing to shutdown and not open back up at all? Why is it ok to go to Walmart and not church? Why are liquor stores and abortion clinics allowed to stay open? Why does it seem outbreaks of pandemics always happen in election years? Why are the infected/death numbers so inconsistent and why are hospitals being paid for C19 patients? Why are some Drs speaking out and what do they have to GAIN in speaking out? Why are there groups specifically out to expose lies, yet they are considered conspiracy theories? Why have there been TV shows from 17 years ago that depicted a coronavirus outbreak and even had the malaria drug named as the answer?(DeadZone Season 2, Episode 14 from 2003) Why are there ties with Hollywood and the Government? Why is it that so many hospitals are completely empty, and workers have been laid off? Why have we done this all for a 1% death toll on a virus? Cancer/Heart Disease have taken way more lives than this… Why didn’t this happen with our current Influenza, SARS, H1N1? Why are they referencing a pandemic from 1918 for reference, haven’t we come pretty far since then.. or have we? Why is Trump SOOOO attacked? Why a push for a vaccine when we know there are drugs that are working? Why attack THIS drug? It’s been used for years. Why not attack Chemo and Radiation drugs, how many people have they killed? Why can I have the right to have an abortion(my body) but may be forced to take a vaccine(my body too)? Why the push for G5? Why is NO ONE questioning all the satellites going up in space right now? Convenient timing as the airports were shut down… Why are people being arrested for being outside? Sure sounds like Marshall Law in some places…. Why the push for the chip insert?

It just all seems like a big gigantic distraction to me… from what?

I’m sure 50,000 people would give me ‘their’ answers to all of these. I don’t want your immediate answers, I want you to think for yourselves. First ask yourself have your answers come from your own experiences? If so I’d be happy to listen. Everyone’s answers come from someone else’s answers and so on…. Remember that game we use to play when we were kids. Sit in a circle and whisper a sentence in someone’s ear…. go around the circle and it’s completely skewed by the end… not even close to the right sentence. That’s how I feel about all of it. Someone states something…. then someone manipulates it, gives their own version of what they heard and wallah… we have no clue what was actually stated.

An analogy… Remember “It’s a Bugs Life?” I know I know… Disney… blah blah….. We are the ants, and when we stand together we can knockout the bullies and be free from this cloud of confusion. Unity will be our saving grace… if we don’t… I believe we will continue to fall down the rabbit hole, the blue pill/red pill… yada yada.. Heck we’ve probably been fed so much BS we don’t even realize we are in a rabbit hole.

One thing for sure: There is a virus… where or how it got to us… I question. There are many amazing medical people working their butts off to do the best they can with the situation. Do I think any of this is their fault, absolutely not. They are following the oath that the swore to keep. Do I question the CDC, yes, so much money involved. Are we being monitored? I think so and probably have been for quite some time, the whistle blowers within have already exposed that.

2 of man’s biggest down falls: Power, Money. Man wants to play god. But man really sucks at it.

And what does Jesus say about all this? “Girl, I got you!” I’ve never been so sure of one thing in my life; my faith and my spirit is alive and well…. I will leave this planet in death someday, but my spirit/soul is signed sealed and delivered! My suggestions: Pray. Pray for unity, guarded minds, and against the spirit of confusion and chaos. Give Thanks. Repent. Renew your minds. Repeat.

I don’t have the answers, I won’t even leave you with my own theory, but I will tell you this… do not become so distracted by the possibilities of what is that we miss what we are blessed with right now. Stay alert, not consumed. Pray.

Thanks for letting me process out loud. Go Freedom of Speech!


The value of art.

In the beginning it was talent, recognition and the ability to do something others couldn’t easily do. It was about making what I saw and putting it to paper. A realist to the max. I started still life drawings at age 10, flowers in vases, barbie horses or perfectly colored pages. Every year I was developing my talent more and more. Always copying what I saw, or copying someone’s idea. I was always striving to be better at it than another, and I missed the boat. Art was never about being good at what I drew, it was about expression. All I was expressing was others ideas or documenting something I saw to the letter. I remember my college professors pushing technique and details. I remember them dawdling over other kids talents, so I tried to be like them, I tried to draw, paint, design and create like them. But I never found my own ‘style’. My senior year at college I remember a professor telling me, “You are a much better illustrator than graphic designer.” My degree was mainly in Graphic Design, which by the way I hated, but my brain told me it would make me more money.

My art was never about heart expression, although glimpses would creep in, a flowing line in a still life that didn’t belong… I’d erase it, or a splash of color that didn’t belong… I’d cover it up, or a bold black showing emotion of the day, and I’d lighten it making all things uniform and perfect for the normal eye.

I just wasn’t ready to be vulnerable with my art, I didn’t know how, I didn’t want to deal with my emotions, for goodness sake I was a single mom, going to school full time and working night shift. I was surviving. Who has time for self improvement or reflection when you are just trying to survive?


20 years later, art has finally came full circle for me and what it is truly about. 3 years ago, after a hard situation at home, I had the desire to paint with nothing to look at, no details just expressing emotion, because frankly, I was pissed.  I needed an outlet and color was screaming at me in my head. My dark reds and blacks filled the canvas with a hint of yellow. And I felt so much better after I did it. It was the first time I had cried through painting my feelings out. Expression painting, it’s funny, I was always drawn to Expressionists, I just didn’t see myself as one.

Over the past 3 years I have painted from the heart, not details and realism, still life’s or technique. I’ve painted to heal some broken parts in my life, to help me on my journey. It wasn’t for money, it was for healing and it feels really good to finally get here. It isn’t about approval or accolades, it’a about expressing my heart and it’s part of healing.

And then God threw me a curve ball.  It’s my “sweet spot”, as my sister said. It’s the thing I don’t want to put a price on or do for praise, it’s what my talent was all about from the beginning. A journey of expression and healing. A way to get emotions out, a way to release my hurt or my joy. It is art therapy, I just didn’t know it.

So now I’m on a new journey and wondering what God will do with this desire He has planted in me. Not keeping it to myself, but to teach others, guide others on their emotional healing and help them do what I have done, heal with art.

God has a funny way of patiently waiting for us to see the talent He has given us and how it is meant for His glory, for good for others. I never saw art as something to use for healing, I only saw it as a raw talent that somehow was only selfishly for me. It’s not, it’s really not.

So my question to you is this: What’s your talent? What are you willing to surrender so God might breathe a new perspective into it, and what might He have in store for your talent?

I’ve been on quite a journey in self discovery. As my children grow and I search to find my identity separate from them. Seeing and expressing my value in this world apart from title: mom, wife, daughter, friend… And then I see artist. Not artist in self, artist in helping others heal. Healing arts for healing hearts. Only God can do that. May I be a vessel worthy of such a call. Yet the only title that carries any true weight is child of God, Princess of the King of Kings. So I wait for the next step from the King of Kings.

I’m excited about this next chapter in my story. How about you?



As many of you know I am an advocate for wellness, a seeker of healing in body, mind and spirit. The mind and spirit have so much influence on the well being of the body. I’ve spend years diving into mind strength, emotional healing and spiritual growth. This journey started almost 10 years ago as my health was wavering and so was my emotions and spiritual walk. You see, when all three are weak, it’s a recipe for a health disaster. I became very sick, doctor after doctor, test after test, no one could help. As I read through the doctors notes, after requesting medical records, comments like, “difficult” patient showed up frequently. I’m sure I was difficult… no answers, no direction, just sick, hurting physically and mentally…

My journey to wellness started with spiritual growth. I took this amazing bible study class called, “Breaking Free”. Layers of my past were mended and the journey to health began. Over the next 10 years I dove into many bible studies, journalizing and worshiping. Healing continued. About 2 years ago I felt a draw to learn more about the power of the mind and what part we have in our wellness journey through our thoughts, and my health continued to improve. My body has been my biggest struggle as I’ve been REALLY healthy, and REALLY not healthy over my life span. I’ve ran numerous races, half marathons and did a triathlon. I was a college athlete and was very strong physically. I also have been 40 lbs over weight, completely lazy and neglected my body by NOT exercising at all!! This yo-yo journey with my body as been a mess. Although I’m well (not taking any medications, only supplements, and have no “conditions”) I know I need to work on getting into a healthier routine with exercise and eating. I’m better than I was, but still need improvement. I’m a work in progress. We all are.

I have felt a call to help people, and encourage others in their emotional healing, mind strength along with spiritual strength. This is what I do, encourage, guide, help. I’ve many times considered going back to school to get a degree to practice medicine or become a counselor. Maybe someday. I’m 43, I’ve got plenty of time… right?

Here is the hard part. All this education, all this time I’ve spent diving into books, resources, learning from my own experience and others, I can’t help my own daughter. She is 18 years old. We have been taking her to doctors since she was 3 months old. Skin issues, joint pain, stomach pain, vitamin deficiencies, anemia, muscle pain, headaches, allergies… The weirdest symptom has been her sensitivity to water on her body… it’s evident to me she has a compromised immune system and major inflammation. On and on we go, test after test, doctor after doctor, medicine after medicine, vitamin after vitamin… I believe we have tried everything from anti-candida diet to allergy shots, MRIs to lab tests for every Auto Immune DisEase under the sun… We’ve done emotional work, counseling, dermatologists, allergy specialists, neurologist, sleep studies, raindrop technique, Chiropractors, Naturopathic doctor. The ND was the closest to getting somewhere. The dietary changes and supplements helped for awhile.

My point, I’m tired, I’m hurting, she’s hurting. As her mother, and a wellness advocate, I feel like a failure, I just can’t come up with an answer for her, no one can. I’ve prayed for her for healing, I’ve went to healing services on her behalf. I’ve interceded over and over and over. What can I do? What can SHE do? What?

I know God has a reason for this, maybe it’s to direct her as she is going into the medical field. It’s so hard, she’s been well for 6 months in a row for her entire life. She lives a roller coaster wellness ride. I hate this. I want to fix it. I want to “find” the cure, I want someone to find the cure, I’ve prayed for immaculate healing, just make it go away.

I’m the one who tells people to NOT claim disEase, that your thoughts can reverse your health, that emotional release can bring physical healing and yet here I sit…. empty handed, feeling defeated and helpless. It could be so much worse, I know, she could be fighting for her life, and maybe part of me feels she is, that this “thing” might consume her if we don’t figure it out. It’s a fear, I’m being real, I could pretend I’m not afraid, what good does that do. Maybe I’m playing God, maybe I want to fix her… who wouldn’t want to fix their kid! I just want her to live like other kids. I don’t want advice anymore, I don’t want another suggestion, I just want her better. I want her well forever. I hate this.

I’m tired of doctors being horrible to us. She has had some of the worse experiences with doctors, the worst one telling her “If you want the boys to like you, you might want to use the cremes on your eczema.”… I don’t know but the girl has had HORRIBLE experiences with doctors, therefore putting a real bad taste in our mouths for anyone even giving a shit about her well being… or seeing her as just another number walking in the door. I’m sick of it. I hate it. I just want it gone so she can move on. I worry about her claiming sickness over her life as she doesn’t know any different… I look at my girl today, she’s been home sick for 2 days this week, dropped 10 lbs(she’s already a size 2!), rash everywhere, can’t eat, stomach and back pain, weak. And off she goes to school today, straight A student, working as a waitress after school, always caring and loving on her friends…. People just don’t know the struggle she has. She says she stays busy so she doesn’t have to think about it.

This is a raw area in my mom journey as my girl is heading off to college next August. I want her well for what comes next in her life. I want more than anything for her to claim health over her life, with positive thoughts and spiritual strength. At the end of the day though, she could still be sick, this is the part I just don’t understand.

We do not get the privilege of understanding God’s reasons or will over our lives or others lives. All I can do is offer it up to Him and give it to Him over and over and over. I pray for her restoration, for healing of body, mind, spirit. We continue with tests and advice from doctors as she flares up… we continue….

This brilliant child of ours will move mountains regardless of her physical health, she already has. Press on child, press on and trust in His reasons. Your health may be a struggle but your brilliance and spirit can’t be touched, signed sealed and delivered by the King of Kings. Keep fighting, claim freedom over it, I believe healing is possible.

If I might ask you to offer up healing prayers for my daughter I would greatly appreciate it.

Love, a tired mom

Unhindered Prayers: Part 1

Mark 11:24 ~ Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

I recently arrived home from a mission trip to Africa(Ethiopia and Uganda) with the organization ManUp & Go. To say my world has been rocked is an understatement. The perspective I have been given about life outside of America is very freeing and very hard. We here battle differently then there, yet we all are in a battle. Coming back from this trip wasn’t as difficult as my first trip to Guatemala, as I was able to see the blessing of organization and the systems we do have in place here, yet the evidence of the distractions we have here is unprecedented.

We have so many opportunities here to make a living and provide for ourselves and our families. I even saw with unfiltered glasses the biggest problem of all, we can do so much here that many times we overlook the need for God. It’s a huge problem, we become our own god, with our own answers, with our own ways and our own means. In this area of Africa they have little distractions and have many times no means to providing for their families so their relationship with the Lord many times is ‘deeper’ due to the NEED. The people of Ethiopia and Uganda are full of love and kindness, accepting us as we are, loving us as we loved on them. To share with them about Jesus was easy, they were seeking hope, and HE is hope. We here in America seek for wealth and happiness through things and stuff, and titles, and performance and awards, many times missing the very hope we need as well. The evil one is crafty keeping us busy on our path to success and many times we miss the many opportunities the Lord puts before us due to distractions and drive to seek “happiness”.

While there the distractions were removed, the titles were removed, the success path was removed which allowed me to see so clearly what God is doing.

There are so many stories I have but I think I’ll start with this one, Simon.

After our Women’s Conference in Uganda they did an altar call. With over 700 women there, the front of the church filled up fast with women coming to receive prayers. We as guests were asked to pray over these women. I will never forget this moment, the sheer power of it all, the praise, the prayer, the Spirit so heavy I could hardly breathe and the tears just flowed. While going up to the women and laying hands on them and praying over them, even though they had no idea what I was saying as many didn’t speak much English, one women grabbed my hand as I laid it on her. She pulled me down to her and said, “Look at my son, Simon! LOOK!” I knew this mean she was asking for prayers for him, yet I had no idea what I was to pray for, so I asked the Lord to help me pray for him. As I prayed for Simon and his mother I felt the spirit lead me to pray healing for him, he looked like a healthy 2 year old to me but I just had a feeling that for her to be so intentional for me to pray for him it must be healing. So I asked the Lord to heal him, body, mind, spirit, emotional trauma, and so on. I honestly don’t remember much of the prayer as it was just pouring out and I felt the Spirit heavy on me. After I prayed for Simon and his mother I went on praying for many others as the Spirit lead until we were done. After the conference we all went outside to prepare to leave, Simon’s mother approached me and said, “Look at him, he is blind.”

I didn’t see it when I was praying, he looked perfectly normal and here I was facing this child with clouded eyes and it was evident. God hid it from me, I truly believe that. He didn’t let me see his blindness as I wouldn’t have been able to pray unhindered prayers over him knowing. God took my flesh out of the way and let me see Simon through His eyes while praying. I remember feeling shook when she told me he was blind, as if I did something wrong, did I pray something I shouldn’t have, what if God doesn’t answer? All the “what if’s” flooded in and then my new sister in Christ Jeanette said to me later that day, “Girl, don’t waste your time praying if you don’t believe Him!” and it rattled me, I thought, how could I pray unhindered? God showed me that HE allowed me to intercede for this young child by blinding me from his condition.


The next day we went back to the Women’s Conference to help with a feeding program. When we got off the bus we played with the kids for a bit and there was Simon and his mom again. I saw him and went over to them to greet them. As we were playing games with the kids Simon got down out of his mother’s arms and walked right up to me. I could see one of his eyes was tracking me and I scooped him up and hugged him and held him tight. His mother grabbed a translator and brought him to Momma Jeanette and I. The translator told us what she was saying, “Simon is seeing, God has answered my prayers! He is seeing better than he ever has!”

Glory to God!! This is what an unhindered prayer looks like. God didn’t have to show me this, yet I believe He did so I could understand what praying unhindered looks like. To truly believe Him and trust Him in circumstances. I know healing is multifaceted. Many times we pray for physical healing and a person may need emotional healing to get physical results too. I’ve spent years studying healing of the mind, body and spirit. All I know is God showed me something miraculous and let me be a small part by being a vessel for His great work and it didn’t require studying, it required faith and trust in His abilities, not my own.

So I leave this message with you to encourage you to pray unhindered prayers, believe Him, believe in miracles, believe.


And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. Ephesians 6:18

Tick Tock


It’s hard to imagine time not affecting our lives. The world we live in today is ridiculously fast paced, it’s instant gratification, it’s more work in less time. Technology is advancing at a rapid pace and it will not be slowing down. We have to realize the importance of our time and what a good balance is in our lives for our well-being: our mental, physical and spiritual health.

When I was 21 years old I was a single mom going to college and working a night job. At that point in my life I was in survival mode, my goal was to get through college so I could get a better job and provide for my son, it was one of the most stressful times of my life. I worked diligently at schooling as I was closing in on graduation, on finals, on the stress of getting that bachelor’s degree. I worked a night shift at a copy center as well to help provide for rent, food and pay for the babysitter. I was also a new mom doing this on my own and I had no idea what I was doing.

At this time in my life I started seeking God, I wasn’t brave enough to go to church yet, but I was brave enough to open my Bible and start seeking him and seeking his guidance to get me through this challenging time. When I look back at it today, at the ripe age of 42, I think how did I ever do it, how did I graduate college, work night shift and raise a child? Even though my faith was in infancy, my God was providing for me, he was providing my sanity, he was providing energy and strength, his strength to get me through this time in my life. I’ve considered what was truly important at that time, was the degree truly important, was the job I had truly important and was being a mother truly important? The amount of stress I was under, I’m sure, didn’t make me the best mom in the world at that time, and I’m thankful for a God who understands and has grace when life is difficult. I felt this pressure to get it done fast, and I think that’s where the problem lies, where we think things have to be done immediately, it’s instant gratification, it’s getting that new title, achieving a job ranking, achieving a degree, and so on, for maybe it will bring me happiness. Is that really what’s important? I certainly can’t do anything about the choices I made then, but I do know if I had it to do over I probably would’ve taken the process a little slower, I would’ve not taken as many classes, maybe worked a little bit less and spent more time being present with my family.

I’m so thankful for a God that understands us, all of us, he understands our growth, he understands the way our brain works, he understands our drive, he understands our desires and he understands that we don’t always understand what we are doing in the process. He is so patient with us to work through this life of ours.

But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.
2 Peter 3:8-9

I spent many years in the workforce working 30 to 40 hours a week, and I’ve watch my husband work 40 to 60 hours a week over the years. We worked diligently to provide for our family, which is important, and a great responsibility. Yet after seeing the simplicity of people’s lives in other countries, I think, could’ve I just been OK with having less and understanding that spending time with my God and my family was the most important thing of all? I’m certainly not implying that you go out and quit your job and stop doing everything, but I am asking us to evaluate what we’re doing with our minutes and our moments we have.

It seems we just get too busy for God. When you think about it, it doesn’t really make any sense, why would we be too busy for the one that provides all for us. He provides the job, he provides the schooling, he provides the home, he provides the opportunities, he provides the family, he provides everything.

I’ve chosen in my life today to sit in a different place, I spend time resting in the Lord, relaxing in his beauty, choosing to work but not overwork, and choosing to spend time with my family and friends building relationships.

Today is much different from what it was even 20 years ago. I didn’t have a smart phone, I didn’t have a laptop or a tablet that offers constant connection and constant distractions. The demand that comes in our world today is a rapid pace of technological growth, and it’s not going to lessen, it will actually get worse, it will increase. The ever-increasing technology that we are facing is going to require us to be extremely intentional with our time. If we don’t take time to rest we can easily slip into feelings of loneliness, depression, anxiety, and overall stress from overstimulation. Making time to spend with people face to face is becoming ever so important to our well-being.

I suppose you’d say I’m someone who jumped off of the gerbil wheel, I just jumped off and said this isn’t what God wants for me and my family. I’m not saying he’s asking you to jump off the gerbil wheel but maybe evaluate where you’re at in your life right now. What’s taking up the most time in your days, what’s truly important, and where does our time need to be? In Ecclesiastes it speaks of a time for everything, we need to evaluate what we aren’t leaving time for and what’s being eliminated from our day that is going to be life-giving, and life breathing, to not only us, but our family, our friends, and our future.

We live in an over involved, over stimulated, and instant gratification world, be on guard of your minutes, moments and intentions.


1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: 
2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, 
3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, 
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, 
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 
6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, 
7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, 
8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. 
9 What do workers gain from their toil? 
10 I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race.
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-11

What is Content?

In January of 2017 the Lord gave me a word, content, I didn’t think much of it as I felt that I was content with what I had been given, and content in my life and wasn’t seeking anything beyond the blessings in front of me. Easy peasy.


January 29th I signed up for my first international mission trip. The trip consisted of a group of medical professionals traveling to an orphanage. They wanted a photographer to capture their work. I would have to come up with the funds as this was a volunteer gig. The call was for the greater good and this was a seed the Lord had planted in me 10 years ago, an opportunity to capture the work of a mission team. The team, which spanned from 6 different states, was going to an orphanage in Guatemala(The Eagle’s Nest). I would be the only one from Kansas and I didn’t know anyone on the team, but, the orphanage was were my nephew had been adopted from in 2005. Guatemala closed down adoption to the USA around 2008.

Content…. in His abilities to provide opportunities.

In preparation for the trip I saved money from a few of my photo sessions to make my first deposit. As the second deposit came due, I was a bit nervous about having enough money, but I made a payment on faith that God would provide somehow, if not, then I probably shouldn’t go. 2 days after I made the “on faith” payment I received a print order for quite a few of my nature photos, enough to cover the entire second deposit! My husband and a few others felt called to donate money as well, yes I said husband, he runs a HVAC business and had been putting funds back to gift me… he truly is the sweetest man. The last and final amount was due and my local church donated the rest of the funds to the organization(The Orphan Door) and it was a done deal.

I’m reluctant to share this but I think I need to. in December of 2016 our daughter decided she wanted to go on a mission trip to Guatemala as well, with the local church youth. After interviews and being accepted to go on the trip she began her process to prepare for the trip to the same orphanage that I would be going to 2 weeks earlier. When our daughter signed up for the trip I had no idea that the opportunity for me to go was even in the cards. I knew I couldn’t go with the youth team as I had already booked a wedding to photograph the weekend they left. On January 15th her seed money was due. I felt it within my spirit to pay for more than just my daughter’s seed money, I paid not only our daughter’s but others as well. 2 weeks later I signed up to go to Guatemala on complete faith that the Lord would provide a financial way for me to go…… He did.

Content… in God’s abilities to provide funds…. The Lord funded my trip and my daughter’s trip, among many others.

In preparation for the trip, my goal was to prepare my heart to be broken, for I knew observing poverty would be hard for this mercy heart. The Lord spoke whispers over and over to me that my job was to observe the blessings in the hard, dark places, to SEE HOPE. One journal I had prior to leaving was this, “Shining bright is not a controlled burn, let the fire burn bright. (References: John 1:5, Matt 4:16, Ps 27:1, Rev 21:23) Be a light, trust Him, and then this:

We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. 2 Cor 4:7-8 NLT

Leading up to the trip, our family had quite a bit of chaos, approximately 3 months of chaos. Teenage struggles mostly and work overload. The one thing I realized when I got to Guatemala was that my struggles were not that big, although they felt big at the time, they really were not.

Content… in His abilities to change perspective.

The Trip

I had never flown in a plane by myself, yes, 41 years old and have always flown with someone I knew. Not only was I flying alone to Houston but I had never been to the Houston airport and I was meeting up with strangers. As you can imagine I was a bit fearful and nervous about this. 5AM I got on a plane from KC to Houston. I sat down next to a couple and decided that if I’m out of my comfort zone I mine-as-well attempt to make a friend. As I started speaking to the lady next to me she shares with me that she has been on 14 mission trips and was on her way to Honduras for a month. She had been in the Houston airport numerous times and was willing to walk me to my gate so I made it on time. We were a bit worried I might miss my flight as I barely had an hour to get to my gate and our flight was rerouted due to weather, we were running late. With no back up plan in place I went on faith and told her I was just going to trust God that he would get me there on time. Little did we know that the plane flew into the International terminal and it was a hop, skip and jump from where I needed to go. I gained a friend and a prayer warrior.

Content… in His abilities to provide guidance.

The next flight was upon me and now it was time to meet the team. My prayer on the plane was, “Let me see what you want me to see, help me to capture life, love, whatever you deem, even the hard stuff if necessary. Protect my family as I am away, and always. Please let all the luggage and travels on to the orphanage go well. Protect us Lord and guide us to be the hands and feet of you. Amen”

Stepping off of the plane


Overwhelmed is the word that comes to mind once in Guatemala City, as I was removed from the USA box. So much poverty, pollution, trash, yet in all of that, beautiful crops come forth and smiles of laughing children and a young boy stops to smile as he sees the camera. I am thankful, but I am ashamed. I am blessed yet humbled at this level of poverty. I asked the Lord to forgive me for not knowing my abundance. My problems are so small. Once out of the box, you can’t look at life the same. When I came back to the states I didn’t realise the effect it would have on me. I cried when I washed my hands in the bathroom sink and could brush my teeth with clean water. I cried in the gas station bathroom because it was clean and had toilet paper. I cried in the grocery store over the multitude of choices. I cried looking across the parking lot of a hotel, it was so clean. I could see the abundance and blessings over America. I had never seen it this way before. The resounding observation that I had while there was that many people in Guatemala are completely content with little, they would give away to their family and friends without a second thought. At the orphanage they served lunch to the children in high poverty, it was called “Manna”. One of my team members saw a child sneak out part of their meal and share it with their mother waiting for them outside.

Content… in the abundance He provides.

Over the next 5 days I witnessed 16 people who had never worked together before, most of us were strangers that came together, each with their own gifting. We loved on these kids and organized and worked together like a well oiled machine. Exams were done, classes were taught, life was shared together, relationships were built, prayers were said and some how God made all of us feel as if we had known each other for years at the end of our week. It was an absolute honor and miracle to witness.

Content… in His ability to bring the hands and feet of Christ together to serve.


Throughout the days at the orphanage, many of us fought colds, toothaches, stomach bugs or even just bugs in general! Many of us faced fears of illness or emotional battles within or felt spiritually unsettled, yet we all got there safely and we all got home safely as we felt the protection of the Lord among us. We witnessed special needs children who had come leaps and bounds in their health. The team came up with plans to help others who may still be struggling physically or in other ways. Many times we see healing as only a physical aspect, but healing can be emotional, spiritual or physical… We joined together and prayed for each other, for the kids, for others outside the walls and the presence of God was felt.

Leaving was hard…. yet many of us felt that saying goodbye was temporary… for many will be coming back. So we trust the Lord in his ability to protect His children and bring restoration and healing in mind, body and spirit.

Content… in His protection and healing.

The 3 things that resonated over and over with our team was this:

Our Brokenness, God’s Calling, Our Obedience

Content… in our journey, His will and His abilities through us.

If you feel called, be obedient to it and be content in all of HIS abilities, not your own.

11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13

Isn’t God amazing?! Blessings.

#orphandoor #eaglesnest


Sayings, Rumors, Stereotypes About Oilers… or More Importantly About ME!

new-oilsI am debunking a myth about essential oil users…. Apparently there is a saying, rumor, stereotype about “US”….

“They all eat organic.” Nope, we try to eat organic if it’s available.

“They are vegetarians.” Nope, not us.

“They are wealthy, they have the $ to spend on them.”  It depends on your definition of wealth… It could be wealthy of knowledge, peace, joy, love…. something to think about.

“They are hippies.” I’m not sure what the hippy definition even is....

“They were already in good health before they started using oils.” UMMMM read below!

“Oils don’t work unless you already have your eating habits and health in good conditions.” UMMM read below!!

OH MY HEAVENS….. Of course these answers are from me and my family and we are seasoned Young Living oilers, 4 years and going!

When I started using Young Living Essential oils it was right around the time my health and my daughter’s health was a disaster. I had been to many specialists for my GI issues and my daughter was going for allergy and dermatology problems.   My GI problems started around 2000. So did my daughter’s issues, she was 3 months old. 13 years of creams, shots, specialists, Hida Scans, CT Scans, ER visits, and meds, and meds and more meds.  I was at a point that I didn’t care how much money I was going to spend, we were going to get better… I wanted us both to be better. So I chose to reach out to a Naturopath Dr and every visit for the next year went on a credit card. Yep, that’s right.

She educated us on the importance of removing chemicals from our home and removing “said” lotion recommendations to homemade recipes, some included essential oils. Young Living soon became a staple in our house just for Thieves and Lemon alone… They replaced our cleaning supplies, ALL of them. The diffuser replaced the toxic candles and plug-ins and we began to get better. Supplements were added and we also started eating better. We chose to not eat out as much, and stop drinking so much soda, we cut sugar back. Yes we changed our diets and along with that we used oils too. 1 year after I reached out to the ND, my health had completely changed. I had no abdominal issues and if I had an upset tummy I’d use some Peppermint or Digize to support my digestive system. I was no longer on any meds, only supplements to replenish my depleted system, depleted in B12, B6, Omegas, V-C, V-A…. No wonder I was so tired!

It’s been 4 years since we chose to make the change to natural wellness. Today I only take maintenance supplements that support my overall wellness. I have more energy and clarity of mind at 41 years old than I ever had in my late 20s and early 30s. Our daughter was better within months. As a teenager we struggle with getting her to stay away from make-ups and the ever “loved” perfumes and for that, she struggles from time to time. She is very aware of her sensitivity to chemicals and foods. She is learning and we are encouraging her to make better choices.

Any change is better than NO change…

You can chalk it up however you would like, 25% change, 50% change, 90% change…. remove chemicals from your environment, even a few removed is better than none. Any small amount of change is worth it. You are investing in your future, in your quality of life. The more I learn about chemicals, chemistry, epigenetics, emotions that are stored in our bodies that can make us sick, and on and on I could go…. All I know is we have choices… we have options, we have resources like never before. My passion for education in Natural Living comes from a place of struggle; struggles physically, emotionally and spiritually. I offer the knowledge that has been taught to me to share with you and I ask you to just make one change. Start with one thing. Turn a bottle over and read the label, read the warnings, read a book, throw a candle away, go for a walk, live free.

For more information on young living visit: https://oily.life/emilybarnes/


How many References to Essential Oils or Aromatic Plants are there in the Bible?

In the Bible there are over 600 references to essential oils and/or aromatic plants.

How many Times is the word Incense Mentioned in the Bible? What Does it Mean?

Incense is mentioned 68 times in the Bible – where 54 of these instances the oils of Frankincense, Myrrh, and Galbanum referenced. Incense actually means “lebanoh” which in those times was frankincense.

What is the Real Meaning of Anointing?

The Hebrew word for anointing means to rub or massage a person with oil. This meant using healing oils of the Bible, not vegetable oil to bless that person on a physical and spiritual basis. True anointing is another lost art and science. Jesus’ feet were anointed with oil several times in the Bible with Spikenard (see Luke 7:36-50 and John 12:1-8).

~ from Dr David Stewart’s book Healing Oils of the Bible